Yep, Gonna Build an Outhouse

Posted in The Widow's Blog | 2 comments

Dagnabbit!  What have we done with simplification?  Replacing the parts of the inside of a toilet tank have gotten way too complicated.

When I was around eight years old, back in the dinosaur days, my Grandparents had an Outhouse.  It was really cool (well not in the summer) and actually was a four-holer.  Although, I never understood why four people would want to be in there together.   Inside the Outhouse, there was a Sears and Roebuck catalog. You could look at this outdated catalog or use it for its real purpose there.   There was a true art to taking a page from that catalog then rolling it in your hands to soften it up.

Now we have indoor toilets which have changed through the years.  Not long ago you could change out the parts of a toilet tank with ease.  A new float, stopper, chain, and gaskets were no problem.  The ideal was a simple dumaflotche let the water into the toilet tank from a water supply line and this dumaflotche had a float attached to it by a long rod when the water lifted the float to a certain height the dumaflotche shut the water off.   See that’s simple.

There was also a rubber stopper covering a hole in the bottom of the tank that was connected by a chain to the toilet handle near the top of the tank on the outside which when pushed down pulled up the rubber stopper to let the water out of the tank to flush the bowl of the toilet in one easy step. After that, the rubber stopper slowly closed as the water filled the tank because the dumaflotche let it do that until the float on the long rod shut the dumaflotche off.  What can I say, Simple!

Well, today I decided to replace the toilet tank innards in one of my bathrooms.  Oh boy!  First, I had trouble getting the dang water supply line unscrewed from the tank while trying to decide which way was righty-tighty or lefty-loosy since I had to feel screw blindly with my hand because I couldn’t get my head between the wall and the toilet.

Next, while lying across the seat of the dang toilet trying to get my head into position to just see the bottom of the toilet tank, I nearly knock myself out on the wall on the side of the toilet then nearly got my head stuck down there. Geez Louise!

Okay, I managed to get that all done without any disasters then it was time to put in the new innards.  New dumaflotche does not have a rod with a float on the end of it, now we have a thang that floats up and down on the dumaflotche.  I can see that is probably an improvement but don’t really want to admit that.  The only thing that could be a pain is the little adjustment screw but I lucked out and it was set right.  So there is no need for me to instruct you on that.  In other words, deal with it on your own or call me tomorrow but not today.

Now we come to the part that ruffled my petticoat, the stopper.  Of course, it is no longer black but bright orange.  Go figure!  This stopper has a dial on the top of it.  Why?  The dial is supposed to be so you can decide how much water goes out into the bowl of the toilet from the tank.  Really?  Who cares as long as everything flushes down the toilet in one flush!  I tried to rip that dial off but to no avail, so I set it to maximum water release.  I’m not trying to waste water but come on, I don’t want a permanent plunger by the toilet.

Anyway, the toilet has had its innards replaced and there was no physical damage done to the bathroom or me.  One thing for sure,  I can now add to my Bio as an Author,  “Nancy Lou Henderson writes a true love story and in her spare time, she replaces toilet tank innards”.

Googling instructions for building an Outhouse soon.  I don’t have to worry about digging a hole in the yard because my faithful dog, ” Digger Boots” has started that process for me.  I already have holes dug to China.

Have fun out there and keep it simple!

 

 

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2 Comments

  1. I love it! It’s hilarious. I’m so glad that those tasks are done for me as I live in an apartment. But these new-fangled toilets look as though you can’t even take the tank top off with the push-button flusher. I used to be able to at least re-hook the chain when it detached itself, but I don’t even know what it looks like inside the tank now. I haven’t needed to have it fixed as it is a fairly new toilet. They put new toilets in the building often enough they probably never need fixing. They take out perfectly good toilets to put in new ones for no logical reason. But then, we have had three new owners in less than two years–two this year–and there’s no explanation given for that either. Talk about confusing. We have to get our tax receipts from more than one landlord. Crazy! Not sure I would want that outhouse here in winter when you would have to plod through a couple of feet of snow. It would be pretty chilly, too, at below freezing temperatures. It would be OK for you, though. But a four-seater? I’ve heard of two-seaters and even that is questionable. Makes you wonder what they did back then, doesn’t it? Thanks for sharing this light-hearted post to bring a laugh at the end of my day. Actually I should be in bed by now, but wanted to read your post first. And then there’s the problem of trying to shut my computer down when it keeps freezing on me. So I’ll say good night. God bless you, Nancy. Looking forward to your next “fix”. 🙂

    • Thank you for reading and commenting Diane. I had so much fun writing this blog and laughed the whole time.
      Yes, things are a changing. I,’m sure the winter would definitely be a challenge up there.
      Praying your computer decides to behave for you.
      God Bless You and I am really enjoying your blogs.
      Love,
      Nancy

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