God’s Beautiful Gift

Posted in Eternal Love | 6 comments

College Station was an amazing fun place.  Frank and I absolutely enjoyed the wonder of all the things that we could go and do there.

Were we poor?  Yes, but wealthy in the things that really mattered.  We had each other, lots of friends, plus lots of family living close by in the same apartments where we lived.  Just like when Frank was in the Army, we were surrounded by couples who shared the same circumstances and poorness as us.

The first semester of school passed by quickly for Frank and me then it was time for Christmas.  We had continued to work with the Doctor in Wharton, Texas on trying to conceive a child.  When we were home during Thanksgiving break, we had gone to an appointment at his office.  He had asked us to schedule an appointment with him during the Christmas break to run one more test.

This test would not be done on me but would be a test run on Frank.  We already knew that I had an ovulation problem and irregular periods, but now the Doctor wanted to run a sperm count test on Frank.  Most men would have been horrified by the thought of the mere mention of that and would have balked at the idea, thinking it went against their manliness, but not my Dimple-faced guy.  Frank said yes to the test immediately without a moment’s hesitation.

Frank and I went to that appointment together, made another appointment for the next week to get the results then drove on to Van Vleck to celebrate Christmas with our families.

When we returned to the Doctor’s office the next week, we were escorted to a large room that was the Doctor’s office.  There was a big desk sitting in the middle of the room with two chairs on one side of it, and on the opposite side of the desk was a place for the Doctor to sit.  Frank and I had just sat down when the Doctor entered the room.  He was a no-nonsense type of Doctor and came straight to the point telling us the results of the latest test combined with the results of the earlier tests.

It was our Doctor’s opinion that we would not be able to have children.  Of course, Frank and I were devastated inside, but we kept it together while in the Doctor’s office.  He told us that if he heard of any new options in the medical world, he would get in touch with us immediately. As we left his office, we thanked him for his expertise in trying to help us.  Frank and I walked hand in hand silently out of the building, out to our car then got inside the vehicle to started our twenty-minute drive from Wharton back to Van Vleck.

As the silence surrounded us, it seemed there were no words that could be said to each other out loud to make the hurt any better.  Every time I tried to open my mouth to speak, I couldn’t hold back the tears or catch my breath from trying to fight them back, and when I looked at Frank, I could see the pain on his face as he struggled with the same emotions but stared straight ahead at the road.

We had only driven a short distance then Frank broke the silence saying, “Well, Nancy Lou that was not what we wanted to hear today, but you know what?  We’re gonna have a baby because God wants us to, but in the meantime, I think you need to register for school at Texas A&M.  We are gonna go to school together, and we are gonna have the best time ever!  What do you say, Lou?”

When I turned to look at Frank, he was smiling, and I could not help but smile too.  My heart was so full of love for this incredible man.  His every thought was for me even when he was hurting.  You know what?  My every thought was for him too.  I never wanted to see him upset of hurt.  That is what real unselfish love is, caring about the one you love more than yourself.

After taking a deep breath then smiling while looking into Frank’s beautiful eyes, I answered, “You betcha Dimples!  Well, we need to get my high school transcript from Van Vleck and get me registered for school.  We are going to have so much fun together more than you could ever possibly imagine.  I love you.”

The rest of the ride to Van Vleck was full of music on the radio with Frank and me singing “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head” by B. J. Thomas.  Nothing could crush us.  Not Vietnam or anything else.  The love we shared was too strong.

Frank and I would go back to College Station to register me for the Spring semester.  I was so excited, and Frank made sure that I knew where every building was where I would have a class. We walked hand in hand around the campus and looked at all of the buildings the rest of the day.

When we got back to our apartment, Frank and I decided that we would walk to the campus together in the mornings if the weather permitted then split up to go to our different classes.  It probably sounds silly to some but for us to actually be college students together, was a big deal to us.  Both of us now had student passes to all of the events on campus, and we planned on attending as many things as possible.  Plays, sporting events, yell practices, you name it, and we would be there.

Frank had blocked his classes and taken some evening classes.  He had enrolled for at least eighteen hours this semester and would work around his schedule at two different jobs.  I was still trying to pass that darn typing test but not doing a good job of it, but Frank liked that I was home.

After my classes, I was studying, cleaning house, washing clothes, and cooking.  When Frank was working in the evening, I would take him supper and visit with him while he was on his break.  One of the places he worked was just a few blocks from our apartment, so Frank would sometimes walk to work, or I would walk to see him and take him a home-cooked meal.

A couple of weeks after the semester started, we received a call from the Doctor in Wharton.  He told us that there was a new fertility drug that he thought we might like to try.  It was expensive, costing $100.00 for three pills.  After talking about it, Frank and I decided that we would give it a try.

Because I was very irregular with my monthly, the Doctor also prescribed a med that I would take for five days to start my period on a particular day.  Ten days from that day, I would take one of the fertility pills each day for three days then on the fourth day, well you know.

After filling the prescriptions, I started taking the first med for five days, but nothing happened but a little cramping.   After more than a week passed, I called the Doctor.  He told me to wait another week then call him back.

Meanwhile Frank and I continued to walk to the campus for classes.  There was only one thing different, and that was it seemed that Nancy Lou had to stop and run into every building we passed to go to the ladies room.

Also, it seemed like I could not get enough sleep and would fall asleep trying to read my Government and History books.  I had a History class at 8:00 a.m. until 9:30 a.m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays which I loved, but suddenly one day, I turned sickly green during the class and was fighting back nausea.  I did not take down notes that day, but I was the first one running out of the room when the class ended.

After arriving home to our apartment, I called the Doctor in Wharton.  I asked him, “What was in those pills?  I think they poisoned me”.

Then I told him what had been happening.  The “no-nonsense Doctor” started laughing then told me that he needed to see me the next day which was a Friday.

The next morning was unbelievable with nausea only getting worse and more frequent.  Frank tried to help me but could only watch me as I hugged my new best friend named “John.”   I did not even bother to go to class that morning. After all, I am sure the other students did not want me there sitting beside them with my head hanging in a bucket.

Frank only had classes until noon that Friday, so when he came home, we got in the car then headed to Wharton, Texas.  There was not a lot of talking on our trip, just Frank driving, the radio playing, and me hanging my head in a bucket.  The music was nice though, that was when I could hear it, the bucket kinda muffled the volume.

Frank would occasionally look my way, but only spoke once telling me, “Nancy, I know this is bad, but I am pretty sure the Doctor didn’t poison you.  Maybe it’s just a stomach bug of some kind?  I love you, and I’m driving as fast as I can.  Make sure you don’t let your hair hang down in there.”

I pulled my head out of the bucket, looked at him probably a little unkindly, but without speaking then with a concerned look on his face said, “Your good.  Don’t worry about anything, especially getting your hair in there.  You look great.”

By the time we arrived at the Doctor’s office building, I was just doing the dry heave thangy, which was not as bad, just an awful lot of noisy gagging.  The receptionist at the desk checked us right in and led us to an exam room.  Not sure why maybe it had to do with the panicked look on Frank’s face or quite possibly my noisy gagging?  Either way, it was quick.

The nurse told me that I had to put on one of those silly backless gowns because the Doctor wanted to do a thorough exam.  Thinking to myself, (Really?  Maybe a little antidote for poison should be considered first?), But I did as she said.  Frank just sat in the chair very quietly.  I really think, by that time, he was a little afraid to comment.  I am so glad he chose not to.  Silent love is good sometimes.

When the Doctor entered the room, he was laughing.  Even though I gave him that drop dead look, he just kept laughing, then he asked the wrong question, “Nancy what’s going on here with you?”

Laying on that exam table with a worthless backless gown on, I pushed up onto my elbows then said, “That medicine you gave me was poison.”

Laughing loudly the Doctor replied, “I really don’t think that is the culprit.  Lay back down and let me do a little exam.”

Laying back down then putting my feet in those darn stirrups, I did as he said.  While he was examing me, he started to laugh again loudly then said, “Nancy, you have not been poisoned, those pills had nothing to do with your symptoms, and this is actually all Frank’s fault.  You have what is called morning sickness because you are most definitely pregnant!”

Frank’s jaw fell nearly to the floor in surprise, I suddenly quit gagging, and the Doctor was smiling from ear to ear.  Did I hear him right?  Was I really pregnant?

The Doctor sat down, and after asking us a few questions, he told us that evidently, we had conceived a baby the end of December which went along with his estimation from the examination.  What this really all meant was that when he had told us we could not have children, I was already pregnant.  The meds I had taken to start my monthly did not hurt my pregnancy but may have strengthened my ability to not lose the fetus.

This chapter is very sensitive and personal.  Infertility was very much a part of our true love story.  There are so many other couples who face the same struggle that we faced to have a child.  We knew the feeling of the uncomfortable tests.  We cried with the disappointments each month which went on for years. We wanted to adopt, and we were going through the impossible red tape.  We were trying to save the enormous amount of money required to adopt a child, even when many of those children were living in Homes waiting for Moms and Dads.

Frank and I never asked God for another child and we never had another child.  We just prayed for others who wanted a child to stay strong in their marriage, love for each other, and love for God.

To everything, Turn,  Turn, Turn, there is a season, Turn, Turn, Turn and a time to every purpose unto Heaven.

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  1. Our only child was born March 4, 1986. We named her Elise Victoria, which at its root means, ” God’s victory “.
    Thank you for sharing yours and Frank’s story of God’s Beautiful Gift…and the love that continues to grow your family.

    • Thank you, Dennis. I know that you know what a Special gift a child is. Our only child was born October 15, 1973 and he has given us five grandchildren(four boys and one girl). We named our son, Matthew Scott. Matthew means “Gift from God”.
      Thank you so much for sharing and commenting. God Bless You.

  2. A beautiful story. I was an only child, born after my parents had been married for 13 years. Although back then they didn’t have all the tests you would have gone through. But I am so glad that you were given that precious gift of a child. God bless.

    • Thank you so much Diane. They were just beginning to find ways to test and treat infertility. There are so many new treatments today. We never had another child but we were so thankful to God for our little miracle baby.
      God Bless You, Diane.

  3. Nancy, I must apologise, I haven’t been to your site for a while. I am not sure why I was directed to this post but I am glad I was. I think God wanted me to read yourlovely story about what must have been a trying time for you and Frank.

    Your memory and ability to recall and then write about that period of your life is amazing. Thank you for sharing it.

    • Thank you so much, Peter. I am happy that God directed you back. Please don’t apologize. I get crazy busy too, and I am not the writer that you are. I am just a storyteller with a purpose from God to tell Frank and my story. God has a purpose, and He has strengthened not only in memory but in opening up my heart and soul to write this Memoir.
      God Bless You, Peter.

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